my knuckles are bruised from knocking on wood

... but at least it's working

open sesame.

i don't think i've mentioned it on here, but i've been volunteering at my old high school. it's been a consistent three weeks, so it's worth mentioning now. last week i gave the grade 12 portfolio class my first assignment. i'm learning the importance of very strict guidelines.

in college we don't know what to do when we are given open assignments, but we always try to twist things when the instructions are very rigid. these kids aren't much different.

anyway, my first assignment was inspired by a page in "caffeine for the creative mind" by stefan mumaw & wendy lee oldfield.. a sparkling little gem i stumbled across on amazon one day. it's full of short little exercises that anyone can do to boost their creative juicies. yes, juicies.

so basically what i had my group of 5 do a self-portrait, they cringed.. so i said it could be realistic, caricature.. whatever. the hair could be any shape, any colour.. but had to be composed completely of text.. words describing them, their interests, anything that has to do with them.. and a minimum of three media had to be used.

the basic idea was to introduce me to them, and it's also going to be something to look back on at the end of the semester.

i promised to do the assignment with them, so mine is up above. self-portraits are still a challenge for me, but i was also rushed. that's my story, and i'm sticking to it.

yesterday we had our little group critique. all but one brought their portraits in, and it was nice to see that they really did put an honest effort in. there was also a wide variety in style.. and i didn't expect it, but each one had so much to say in their "hair".. small and slightly incoherent in the best way possible. never give yourself away. one girl used text messages she had sent to various friends. i like how they took the initiative to decide what they wanted to say, and it still had something to do with them.

frustration was expressed with my portrait on the table, but that wasn't my goal. i'm hoping that it inspires a little. i'm beginning to formulate what i want to achieve with this class this year.

mixed media is a biggie - i'm hoping that i can show them how much dimension and variety multiple media usage can give, and how many things can be used to make art that you wouldn't normally think of

portraits - we are going to do several. i have learned so much by drawing portraits.. if you can get someone's face to look right, it's such a big lesson in proportion that can be applied to almost everything in art.. and nothing is more gratifying than drawing a face that looks a little alive

composition - i don't have alot to say about it, but i'm sick of the center.

and finally, exhausting your creativity and ideas until you break through to something else.. which is what we are working on for assignment number two. i did a mild version of an assignment i had in second year illustration where we had to do 90 reproductions of a simple object. my little high schoolers are doing 30 for me. they have to use 5 different media, and the rest is up to them. they will get stuck at 10. and that is the point.

i love this.

and today, i did something new. i bought virgin honeycomb at one of my many jobs after work. i ate it, too. i wasn't sure if i was supposed to swallow the wax as well, but it kind of turned into a natural chewing gum after a few minutes, and i decided that i didn't want that in my stomach.

i also got my favourite granola, the only hippie mix i'd ever pay $10 for.. but i get a discount so that makes it ok.

..and some ezekiel bread. sesame.

closed sesame.

soul sings to me through altec lansing speakers

i finished my sketchbook.

i finished it with a personal rant in red pen and a quick typical cafe drawing delivered over a grande ginger green tea (i got a few starbucks cards from work, free drawing opportunity and a comforting beverage. sweet.) finishing the book only took me about 3 months to do..

i like what i did, but i should have done more.

so now i've got a book that has 4 pages worked, started back in march or april.. moleskine's are too nice and too expensive to waste because it's not chronological.. and i'm big on the whole chronological thing.. so i'm trying to get into this one.. i've got 2 more that i'd like to get through before christmas. probably works out to 3-5 pages per day, keeping in mind there will be days i won't do anything at all.

on a completely different note, i found a soul station on iTunes.. but they keep playing crap 90's smooth rap crap.. not really feeling it. reminds me of grade 6 dances. this song was probably sorta cool then. maybe.

banana. watermelon. seed.

i put a hole in my middle finger.. and other true tales

this makes me happy



always..

and yes, there really is a hole in my finger, serves me right with my bad picking-at-things habit..

an update from last time, i also decided to return to sheridan. i had an appointment at 10am last wednesday morning and actually made it in on time (that NEVER happens).. then i had to sit and wait for my counsellor to go talk to some people and find out if i could even go back at all this year.. (long story, i might tell it in 5 years when it doesn't matter anymore), and she comes back to say that i had class that afternoon at 2! it's only one class, and it's life drawing.. so i know i can kick ass with a class finally, i'm still so pumped about the whole thing.. *glee*

one of my current jobs has gotten me into this whole goal-setting thing, so right now i've got a goal for the next month of finishing up my current sketchbook and getting halfway through the next.. so you can count on seeing some more frequent posting, and even more on conceptart.org.. also, i'm aiming to have my first show before 2010, so i've got a little over a year..

big dreams.

life is good.

cool.

rocky mountain love affair

two days ago i was in a ford fusion, driving away from the newest addition to my heart. i spent the majority of last week nestled in the little place known as banff. i had been through the rockies before, when i was 8. crammed in the backseat of an oldsmobile with my two little sisters that i had yet to become friends with. with family, i find it's easier to love than like. i'm happy to say that i like just about every family member i've got. that says alot.

i landed on monday, and my wonderful friend josh, whom i haven't seen in probably 4 years came to pick me up from the airport, as he just happened to move to calgary this past june. i was so excited to see him again, and we had a fantastic day in calgary and in banff. i miss him again, i forgot how much fun we could have.

i don't remember what my face looked like as we approached the mountains, but i remember how i felt. vacations usually have a lasting impression on me.. but nothing like this.. pretty much since monday i've been trying to figure out a way to get myself back out to that side of the country..

so completely unrelated, and at the exact same time so VERY related, i've been debating what to do about school. it's just like me to change my mind when it's almost too late. the plan for this year was to take time off school and see what i can do with art, and then this whole massage therapy worked it's way in and then i stopped working towards getting school straightened out. tomorrow school starts. i'm enrolled in shit all and i want to go back to sheridan. so i will probably go stand in a line tomorrow and hope that someone shows a little mercy towards a girl that can't shake herself of the love of design and colour and shape and line and reality and distortion. i'm still obsessed with art books, my art has taken such a drastic turn since italy.. and i miss sheridan. i almost feel like i would be cheating if i went ahead and tried to start a career right now.

it's not that i want to prove something to anyone. my heart just melted when i was looking through this year's grad book. yeah, sure.. i could excel at school for massage therapy, i would probably come to some pretty amazing conclusions if i went ahead with my BSc and did research, or i could try really hard to help people help themselves if i was a doctor or nutritionist.. but people will help themselves if they really desire it.. just like i did.

this is something i can't shake.. yeah, there's ebb and flow and sometimes i wonder what the hell i think i'm doing with my life..

i was thinking about it while watching chris & the boys play at ribfest last night. the kids that are drawn to the sound and can't help but move.. all ages sitting and watching and loving every second of it.

how many people in their life wanted to use an art form for any given reason, but never gave themselves the time, or someone else didn't believe in them enough to allow them to develop their skills...?

i live my life by love. this is what i love to do. the details will follow.

the lines will lead.